Lonely In Lewisville

I have always battled with feeling lonely and having "no friends". It is easy for me to feel lonely because I am a loner. I have a hard time making friends, too. I have made a few friends on my own, but most of the friends I have made have been through my brother. A lot of the friends I made through him I can't tell you where they are. That's a whole nother story for another time.

These days, I am feeling so lonely. My family is far away. My friends are in the area, but it is a 30 minute or so drive. I can rarely get them to come out here, even for special occasions. I get sick of having to be the one to travel to see them. I am usually the one who calls and then folk get upset with me for not calling more often. Its like, "Can't you call me?"

Anyway, I am lonely. I don't get to fellowship with the people at church. A few of the ladies at church know who I am, but it still ain't the same. I don't feel like I have anyone who cares about me, enough to check on me. I don't have a mother figure, a sister, or anything. Man, I miss my family. I hate being here like this. I can't hang out with anyone. Almost everything I do, I have to do it by myself. I get so sick of doing stuff by myself. I can't even call anyone to come pick me up and go somewhere. I don't know anybody around here like that. I can barely call somebody to give me a ride to church. That's very disheartening. I wanna go to church and stuff, but I don't have a way all the time.

The people at school make me feel so left out at times. A lot of them go to the same church, so they are always talking about stuff that goes on at their church. I don't have a lot in common with the teachers from my class. I try to "be apart of the group," but it still ain't what I need. I am probably making a bigger deal about stuff than I need to. Although, I know that they know each others families. Yet again, I am left out of "the group." How is it that I am never able to get "my family" to be a part of my professional life? I still ain't figured that one out yet. I got a feeling that when things clear up, it will be the same. But that's the way things are in my life.

At the Fall Festival, they had their families at the festival. They had friends to work their station with. Why did I end up at a station by myself? On top of that, it was hard getting people to come be a part of my station. I had the music station. People were supposed to dance. It was like pulling teeth to get those kids to come dance.

I hate being me sometimes. Why I gotta be so shy?

I hate not being able to fellowship at church like I want to. That's all I have. But, I can't fellowship right now. I know that it is going to change one of these. It's just so hard right now. I am so tired of feeling alienated and out in the wilderness. Longing for a motherly hug from one of the church ladies is getting old. I know all I have to do is wait for a change. Although, I am not sure how much things will change. I appreciate the moments that I can get from time to time. Then it gets even harder because those moments make me want more moments like that.

Westside is that kind of church, but you have to be the one to make yourself available. The church is so big that people don't particularly notice you unless you make yourself available. I hate big churches for that very reason. At least at small churches, it is easier for people to notice you. I can't stand feeling lost in the crowd.

I get so frustrated when opportunities to fellowship are passed up for no apparent reason. I can't even understand it. I ask for a reason, but I don't get one. That makes things even worse. I still ain't figured out why we couldn't fellowship this afternoon. There wasn't any reason. There is no school. We aren't doing anything other than goofing around. The goofing around could have been postponed for 30 minutes. I wish I knew the reason, maybe then I wouldn't feel so let down.

I have prayed about it. I will keep praying about it. I will have to keep waiting. Until then, I guess I will keep making up people in my head to be my friends. That's some mess. Maybe that's what makes me such a good writer, I make up all of my friends.

Recently, I found out that someone that I am close to is getting a divorce from her husband. I knew the husband first. I am still adjusting to that news. Then I heard that the woman cheated on the husband. How am I supposed to process that kind of information? The woman is my girl. I am close to her. She is the closet thing to a best friend that I have. I haven't asked her about any of this yet. I don't even want to ask her. If she says that it is true, I will be totally crushed. I can't even begin to figure out how to deal with this. If this ain't about some craziness.

Yes, I have a husband, but I need to fellowship with some women every now and then. Girl power rules.

I am going to go to bed now. I am all cried out.

Lord, help me to not feel so lonely. I know that I am not alone, but I still feel so disconnected and alone. Work out my situation so that I can fellowship with my church family more. Amen.

This Week...

I didn't finish my goals for last week again. I am going to have to stop doing that.

Here are my goals for next week…

• Work on my outline. By 10/29.
• Finish my NaNo Icons for this year. By 10/30.
• Put NaNo Images for characters and places on the blog. By 10/30.
• Take the candy to the church for the Fall Festival. By 10/31.
• Begin NaNoWriMo. On 11/01/07.
• Write between 5,100 and 10,500 words this week. By 11/03.

Milk-to-Meat

I finished my Milk-to-Meat assignments tonight. I was three lessons behind. I normally do them on the Saturday before I go to class, but I haven't been doing them lately. I went to bed early one Saturday night and forgot to do it. Then, I kept forgetting to do them. I will be back on schedule this week. I have caught up. I don't plan on getting behind again. I can mark one more thing off of my goals list for this week.

Today

Today, I feel... happy.
Today, I thought about... how much work I have done on my novel.
Today, I prayed... Thank You, Lord for my husband.

Lazy Today

This has been a very lazy and relaxing day for me. there was no stress, no turmoil, no rushing. It felt good. I slept later than I wanted to, but that was cool.

I wash a few loads of clothes. I detest washing clothes. It is one of the chores I hate more than anything. I would rather clean the toilet than wash dishes. I know I got issues. To me, washing clothes is a necessary evil.

Maybe one day, I will like washing clothes, not likely though.

Oops, I forgot to do my NaNo Icons site today. Oh well, no worries. I will do it later.

Good Day Today

My husband and I just hung out today. It felt good to just hang out with him. We went to Red Robin. That was fun. I had the Chili, Chili Cheeseburger. It was good. I didn't finish it, though.

Today

Today, I feel... tired. I worked late last night participating in the Fall Festival at my school.
Today, I thought about... how crazy the weather has been.
Today, I prayed... Lord, let my husband make 95 or better on his final exams this weekend.

Tired

I am so very tired. My school had its Fall Festival last night. I decided to pick the activities that you had to dance in. I didn't stretch or anything before dancing. I am tired. I am so ready for the weekend. I am planning on chilling for most of Saturday. I have a whole week's worth of video tape to watch. I haven't watched anything this week. I even have to watch the shows that my husband watches. That is about 12 hours of TV. Oops, I forgot to add Sunday night in that equation, so that's a total of 14 hours of TV. WOW!

I fixed my NaNo Icon site last night. Everything is everything now. Yippee.

Have you ever had someone get on your nerves so that you wanted to tell them to go somewhere and sit down? That is how I am feeling right now. Oh, just relax, would you?

I get to leave work an hour early. Yea! I need to go to the post office today.

Today

Today, I feel... flat out tired.
Today, I thought about... how crazy those kids were.
Today, I prayed... Lord, please don't let me hurt nobody today.

Crazy Day So Far

I have had a crazy day so far. When I walked into the door at work, I was told to go to a classroom that wasn't mine. I didn't know the students and I didn't know the teacher all that well. It was crazy to say the least.

I am about ready to catch a case up in here. This folks is crazy. That's all I can say right now for fear of reprisal.

Today

Today, I feel... excited and tired
Today, I thought about... how crazy T-Mobile hotspot was acting.
Today, I prayed... Lord, don't let me throw this computer. :)

Trouble, More Trouble

Well, I am at Border's Bookstore. I tried to connect to T-Mobile, but I had so many issues. I had to shut down my computer and then reboot it. I got so frustrated. It finally got to working right.

I am still having trouble with BlogJet. I am so sick of that program. It has a feature where you can group post, but, the ignant program still ain't working. I wasted my money for nothing. One of these days, I am going to ask for a refund.

I have tried to find some help for my BlogJet Problem, but it ain't worked yet. Maybe if I downloaded and re-installed the software, it would work, but I don't know. I am just tired of it.

Today

Today, I feel... too happy. I finished my character sketches.
Today, I thought about... Jerry. It's his birthday.
Today, I prayed... Lord, blessed children all over the world.

Today

Today, I feel... happy although the morning started out crazy.
Today, I thought about... what I need to do for NaNo.
Today, I prayed... Lord, help me to be a good wife.

Crazy Day

Today was a crazy day. We woke up late because the volume on the alarm clock had been turned down, so we didn't hear it. Both of us were late for work.

I missed the bus. I hate it when it rains. The bus driver is always either early or late. I had to call a co-worker to come pick me up. It was a mess this morning.

The kids acted a fool. All but 3 of them had to go to yellow today because they were acting a fool during computer lab time. Why do they keep acting crazy? I can't figure it out.

Today

Today, I feel... bad. I did something on the computer and my husband lost a file that he was working on.
Today, I thought about... Milk-to-Meat. I am learning a lot and seeing more and more of God's word and life.
Today, I prayed... Lord, help me to not worry about my necessities. I know that You will always provide them for me.

This Week...

I didn't finish my goals for this past week, so they are my goals for this week.

Here are my plans for the week...

• Create and finish my NaNo Icons for this year. By 10/28.
• Create and finish my NaNo 2007 blog. By 10/24.
• Work on my character sketches. By 10/26.
• Work on my setting sketches. By 10/26.
• Work on my outline. By 10/26.
• Submit all of my Milk-to-Meat assignments. By 10/28.

I have got to get on this stuff this week. I put due dates on each item, so I will have to do them. I may have to go into seclusion to get all of this work done, but I have to get it done. I want to focus on other things for the last three days before NaNo starts. I still have to do the sketches for my places and I have to find images to represent my people and places. This is going to be a full week.

Lord, help me to stay on task this week. Help me to accomplish all of the goals that I have stated above. I need to finish all of the things listed on my list. When I get tired or discouraged, give me strength and courage to go on. With Your help, I know I will complete the tasks before me. Thank You, Lord for Your help. Amen.

I Messed Up

I installed i-tunes on my laptop today. I wanted to transfer my purchased music onto the laptop. I didn't have all of it on my iPod, so I synced up my iPod with the purchased music. Well, when I plug my iPod into the computer, it caused my husband to lose a file that he was working on. He had done a lot of work on it, too. I feel so bad. I wish I wouldn't have done that.

He had to do a lot of work over. I hate it when I do stuff like that. I lost a file like that a few weeks earlier. I apologized to my husband. He is still upset, though. I can't blame him, though.

Today Was a Good Day

Today was a good day. Nothing much happened. I cook Sunday dinner today. That felt good. I finally watched my tape for the week. I usually tape all of the TV shows that I like to watch and then watch them on the weekend. I finally finished watching them today. I watched my husband's shows, too. I watched a lot of TV after we came from church.

Today was a real good day.

Today

Today, I feel... happy. I got my hair did.
Today, I thought about... the beauty shop scene that I want to write about in my NaNo novel.
Today, I prayed... Lord, let me write a novel that glorifies You and brings other to You.

Crazy Fast Now

My computer is running so much faster. Now, I have 80 GB of free hard drive space. I am so happy. Everything is running great.

My Hair Is Done

My hair is done! Thank the Lord. I look so much better now. I got some spirals.

Get this, my hairstylist left me in the salon by myself twice. Once to go get some products, the second time to go get something to eat. It was okay. I was sitting under the dryer both times.

I feel so much better now. Only problem was, the wind was blowing and I was scared that the curls were going to drop just as soon as I got outside. They stayed up for awhile.

Hard Drive

I took my computer to the store to get the hard drive installed. The tech that waited on me was so cool. he was nice and he hooked me up with a good deal. I am excited. I am getting a 120 GB hard drive. That's like so crazy. I was hoping that I could get a bigger one, though. I couldn't get the 160 GB drive. It wouldn't fit in my computer, but that's ok. I am grateful that I got a new hard drive. I can't wait to get it back.

Today

Today, I feel... tired. I had to work late.
Today, I thought about... how crazy this week has been.
Today, I prayed... Lord, help me to look past my circumstances and see You!

One Long Day

Today has been one long day. I ended up having to work late because a co-worker was absent. The sub she had was good. She had a whole group of kids surrounding her. She was drawing pictures for them. It was cool because she had one of the troublesome kids sitting with her.

All of the kids used up the paper that I had in my bear, Abigail's backpack. I asked them not to use up the paper, but they did. It is okay though. They wrote Abigail a lot of notes. She had like 10 notes in her backpack. I couldn't read most of them though. It was sweet of them to write her the notes.

I am pretty tired today.

I made a hair appointment for tomorrow. I am also going to take my computer in to get a new hard drive. Yeah!

Today

Today, I feel... sad, indifferent, and tired.
Today, I thought about... a friend who I heard something bad about and how I was going to ask her about the news I heard.
Today, I prayed... that I will know how to ask the bad news and how to respond to the answer.

Won't It Be Grand

There is a song by Sean Simmons called "Won't It Be." It is a song about getting to Heaven. This song blesses my heart every time I hear it. I put the song on repeat, too.

It is an amazing thought to think about Heaven. The wicked will cease from troubling and the weary will be at rest. We will get to see Jesus and everyone else that we want to see. It's going to be grand.

Won't it be grand when I see Jesus? There have been so many songs written about seeing Heaven. Douglas Miller's "When I See Jesus" was the jam back in the day. Everybody was singing that song. "I've learned how to live holy… I'll gain eternal, eternal life… When I see Jesus, amen. When I see Jesus, amen. All my troubles will all be over. When I see Jesus."

I played the drums for Douglas Miller at a Back-Home Revival service in Memphis, TN one year. It was cool.

Blah!

I am feeling so blah today. I have no idea what is going on. It has bee a crazy day. I must have woke up on the wrong side of the bed. I have been listening to some Gospel music and trying to get my head together. I wish I new what was going on today. It may just be one of those mornings where I have to just wait until my blahs wear off.

Today

Today, I feel... sad because my other god mother lost her father, too.
Today, I thought about... my god mother.
Today, I prayed... for my god mother and her family.

My Other Godmother

I got an email today that my other godmother lost her father. I will have to call her. I have heard about three deaths in a span of three days. What is going on?

Our pastor is always saying, "One thing in life is sure, we will all die if the Lord doesn't come back before we do."

Craziness

Today has been crazy. I am so tired. Each day with these kids is getting crazier and crazier. Why do they act like they don't know what to do?

It is so frustration to me when people who know what to do, don't do it. I can't stand it. It irks me to no end. I guess I have to get over this thing.

Today

Today, I feel... ecstatic!
Today, I thought about... the perfect image that I found for my prewriting and the great cover that I am going to design for my NaNo Novel.
Today, I prayed... for my health.

Today

Today, I feel... sad because of the news about one of my god mother's father passing.
Today, I thought about... my godmother.
Today, I prayed... for my godmother and her family.

Hard Drive

I have finally saved up enough money to get a new hard drive for my computer. I am very excited. I can't wait to get it. I hope I can get it on this weekend. I recently upgraded my memory. The guy @ Fry's told me that needed a bigger hard drive because my computer was still running slow to have so much memory. I can't wait to see how fast my machine runs once I get the hard drive.

I hope I can get at least 100 GBs.

News, News, News

I heard some news about one of my godmothers. Apparently, she lost her father. I heard about it from my brother who lives in Atlanta. I still want to know how he gets all the news first when he is in Atlanta and I am down here. Oh well.

I was saddened by the news about my godmother's father. I didn't get to go to the funeral because it happened on this past weekend. I wish I could have been there for her.

Today

Today, I feel... sickly.
Today, I thought about... throwing up.
Today, I prayed... that I wouldn't throw up.

Sickly

I am feeling sickly today. I haven't gotten much done today. I will keep trying to do what I can do. I wish those kids at school would cover their mouths when they cough. I can't see why it is so hard for them to remember to do that. I mean they cough right in my face, too. God that gets on my nerves. They have all kinds of nasty germs. I catch everything, too. I have already been sick once this year. I don't want to be sick again. Fooling with these allergies are enough. Lord, please help me.

I may need to get some Airborne or something like that.

Today

Today, I feel... like prewriting.
Today, I thought about... the fact that I can't find a suitable picture for my prewriting.
Today, I prayed... for my safety.

Today

Today, I feel... pleased about the NaNo Icons that I created.
Today, I thought about... how many more icons I want to create.
Today, I prayed... for my family.

Today

Today, I feel... overjoyed
Today, I thought about... my NaNo idea.
Today, I prayed... that I will be able to touch someone's life with this story.

Today

Today, I feel... so happy and excited.
Today, I thought about... my story for NaNo.
Today, I prayed... "Thank You, Lord for giving me an idea for NaNo.

Today

Today, I feel like... I have no friends.
Today, I thought about... having no one to write with.
Today, I prayed about... coming up with an idea for NaNo.

Writing Buddies & Other Stuff

I wish I had some local friends to write with, some actual real people in my life. I get so lonely sometimes. It is hard in November because I am always writing by myself. I can't get anyone to write with me. I want to ask the people at my church, but I don't know anyone well enough. Oh well. I will go it alone.

I have tried to get some write-ins going here in the city, but no one has ever shown up. I get tired of fooling with that stuff. They like to meet at crazy places. I heard some people were meeting at a bar. Yea, like that's where I need to be.

Sometimes it is hard being a Christian in this crazy world. It can be a lonely existence at times. I keep trudging along.

I love doing NaNo, but I wish I had someone to do it with me.

I still don't have an idea yet. I keep thinking on what to write. I have a lot of ideas, but I am not feeling them. I can't figure this out. I am still waiting to see what hits me. I may just try to finish Allegations, even though I am not ready to finish it yet.

Today

Today, I feel like... I want to pass out.
Today, I thought about... how hot it is at the fair.
Today, I prayed about... how hot it is in October.

Fair Day

My husband and I went to the Texas State Fair. I had fun, but I almost got sick. We rode rides. Most of the rides they had at the fair were rides that spun around. On the Gravitron, I thought I was going to lose my lunch.

It was so hot. This weather has been crazy. I was sweating. I had the nerve to wear a black t-shirt. Ain't that some mess. Everybody, their mama, and their cousin were out there. It was a holiday and a fair day for most of the schools. We had free tickets.

We got conned (SMILE) out of $20. We got talked into playing one f the games. We played darts. The girl kept talking us into playing with the promise of a prize. We did get a prize finally, after we had spent $20 buying chances to throw the darts. I got a Dallas Maverick teddy bear dressed in Maverick gear. It is cute.

We ate a corny dog. I wanted a turkey leg, but several of the places that I went to had run out of turkey legs. How do you run out of turkey legs at the fair? That's some bull.

My husband wanted a fried Snicker bar, but he said it was too hot to try to get one. Neither of us got what we really wanted in the end.

Today

Today, I feel like... I am bored at church.
Today, I thought about... a church service that is more exciting.
Today, I prayed that... our services will be more exciting.

Slow Day Today

Today was a slow day today. I thought about what to write for my NaNo, couldn't come up with anything, still. I will keep working on it.

I came up with an idea or two, but neither of them appealed to me. I am not ready to finish Allegations yet.

I goofed around on the NaNoWriMo site for awhile. It is slow as Christmas.

I am thinking about getting a new hard drive for my laptop.

That's it for today.

Today

Today, I feel like... I am spinning around in circles.
Today, I thought about... just sitting still.
Today, I prayed about... my life.

Spiraling

I found a great new spiral today at Staples.

I normally try to use a 5.5x8.5 binder for my writing things, but those things get cumbersome. I have been trying to use a 80 page spiral of that same size, but I can't add and rearrange pages like I can with the binder. It is irritating.

Well, I found a great spiral today. It is a Rolla notebook. With Rollabind notebooks you can refill, remove, replace, and interchange pages according to your needs at that moment.

I almost went crazy when I found the notebook. I only bought one this time. I am planning on going back and getting a few more, at least all of the colors they have. I can't wait to get more.

I don't like the kind of paper that they use with the notebook, but I can live with that.

Today

Today, I feel like... I can't write anything at all.
Today, I thought about... not being able to write.
Today, I prayed about... writing!

Hard Writing These Days

It's been so hard to write these days. My allergies have been causing me to have problems. I am trying to gear up for NaNoWriMo. I haven't even written anything for my 1,000 Words per Day. This is not going to be good if it continues into November.

I am so tired of this.

Today

Today, I feel like... I am picking the wrong kinds of topics for Rep Days.
Today, I thought about... asking everyone what kind of shirts they want to wear.
Today, I prayed for... my husband.

Rep Days

I am in charge of REP DAYS at my school. Twice a month, we all wear shirts that rep a particular topic. We have had High School Day and Pro Team Day. We are scheduled to have a lot more days before the school year is out.

Not a lot of people have participated, though. I think it is because they don't have the shirts we requested or either they forgot. I hope that when we Rep our school, everyone wears their shirt.

Today

Today, I feel like... I will suffer with these allergies through November.
Today, I thought about... not being able to write in November because of my allergies.
Today, I prayed about... my allergies.

Nasty Days

Lately, we have had some nasty days. The weather has been bad. My allergies have been acting up. It has made writing hard. I am not supposed to be dealing with this kind of stuff right now. I am about ready to scream.

I hope this stuff clears up before November.

Today

Today, I feel like... I am alone in this writing thing.
Today, I thought about... leaving a Yahoo! Group because I am not getting what I need.
Today, I prayed about... feeling lonely in my writing endeavors.

No Help Either

I am a part of this group. I expected the group to be more help, but it hasn't been. I get so frustrated at times when people don't move as fast as I do. I have been doing that all my life. I need help with that. Oh well.

Today

Today, I feel like... I will never come up with a story for NaNo.
Today, I thought about... my story for NaNo.
Today, I prayed about... my story for NaNo

Something New

I decided to start something new. I started blogging TODAY. In this entry, I finish off three phrases.
Today, I feel like...
Today, I thought about...
Today, I prayed about...

I will be doing that everyday from now on.

Mad Challenge #4 from Mad Challenge

Your Ideas

When I get an idea, I usually think about it for awhile, a day or two, to decide if it is a good idea. After that, I write it down in my idea journal. I try to write a date beside it, so that I will know when I got the idea.

I have all of my ideas saved for later use. I have yet to write most of them. This year is the first year that I have considered writing about one of my previous ideas. The past three years, an idea came to me.

I have two copies of my idea journal; one (a pocket size composition book) I carry in my back pocket at all times, the other is a 5.5X8.5 spiral that I keep in my backpack.

I keep meaning to put my ideas in a file on my zip drive.

Mad Challenge #3 from Mad Challenge

Past NaNo Experience

I write about romance from a Christian perspective. I also write about church life and how crazy things can be when "CHURCH Folk" start acting up.

I have done NaNo for the past 3 years (since 2004). Here's a description:

2004 - Captive By History - http://www.alwaysinspired.info/nano2004/

It is a story about love, friends, family, and college life. This is the story of how Kourtnee Adams and Colt Austin meet and start dating. It ain't easy for college students trying to study, date, and live life. Enjoy, Captive By History.
35,431 words

2005 - Flirting With Danger - http://www.alwaysinspired.info/nano2005/

It is a story about love, family, friends, and so much more. It ain't easy being the Bishop's son and trying to date an older woman. Enjoy, Flirting with Danger!
97,189 words
(I didn't have a job this year.)

2006 - Allegations - http://www.alwaysinspired.info/nano2006/

It is a story about trust, betrayal, friendship, church, and ALLEGATIONS. This is what happens when CHURCH FOLK "SHARE" information. Enjoy Allegations!
37,435 words
(I don't think the word count is correct. I hand wrote this novel.)

More info about my NaNo Novels is here: http://www.my1000words.info/NaNoNovels/ .

Mad Challenge #2 from Mad Challenge

Are you doing NaNo?

Yes, I am.

I have two ideas tossing around in my head. I can also finish last year's novel, but I don't know just yet.

What Is NaNoWriMo?

NaNoWriMo stands for National Novel Writing Month. National Novel Writing Month takes place in the month of November. People all over the world interrupt their already hectic lives and write a 50,000 + word novel. The object of the endeavor is to write 50,000 and that's all that matters. There is no editing, just writing.

Mad Challenge #1 from Mad Challenge

Do You NaNo?
I am so like in. I am not insane, though. :P

Lost Entries

I write my entries in Word and then transfer them to my blog. I lost all of my entries for September. I am so hurt and upset. I lost a whole file. Ugh. Computers suck.

Goals for the month of October

1. Come up with story idea for NaNoWriMo.
2. Outline my story for NaNo.
3. Create my character sketches for NaNo.
4. Pre-write for NaNo.
5. Write something everyday no matter how small.
6. Create NaNoWriMo icons.

Pride Stickers

I got 32 pride stickers this month.
Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y

Writing Goals

For the month of September, I wrote 31,961 words. Yea! I wrote everyday but one. I was sick that day.

Goals for Last Month

I completed all my goals for last month.

Challenge 15

My Worst Date

The worst date I went on includes all of the dates I went on in college. I didn't have a good date while I was in college. I will talk about the worst one.

Bradyn had asked me out a week earlier. He seemed nice enough. I had gone out with cuter guys before, but he seemed nice.

We had decided to go to the movies. That was about the only thing we could do in the small cowboy town of Colton. I was going to go pick him up because he didn't have a car. I smiled. College students didn't have much in the way of money or things in Colton, but we made do.

I drove over to the dorm to pick up Bradyn. I was looking great as usual. I only hoped that he had put some effort into his attire. I had been on a date a couple of weeks earlier who had shown up in a torn and wrinkled t-shirt. I shook my head and hoped for the best.

I walked up to Bradyn's door and knocked. When I opened the door, his roommate opened the door. Bradyn's roommate was cuter than Bradyn. I reminded myself that I was here to see Bradyn, not his roommate. Bradyn's roommate called Bradyn. A few minutes later, Bradyn walked into the room. He looked nice. He had on a starched polo shirt and some starched blue jeans. I sighed in relief as we walked to the door.

We drove the movie theater without much conversation. If it had not been for the music that was playing on the stereo, it would have been totally silent.

We reached the theater. We got out of the car and walked to the front door of the theater. I waited a brief moment for him to open the door, but he didn't. I opened the door for myself and then walked into the theater. He walked in behind me. We walked up to the ticket counter to purchase the tickets. He purchased two tickets for the movie. We headed for the second set of doors that lead directly into the theater. I was tempted to give him another chance at opening the door for me, but I didn't want to get my feelings hurt again. I opened the door for myself and walked through.

I was about to walk to the concession stand, but Bradyn grabbed me around my waist and said, "You don't want any popcorn, do you?" I made a face and walked towards the theater as I was directed. I did want some popcorn. I wasn't going to get large popcorn. I would have gotten a small box, but I wasn't even given a chance.

The movie would have been enjoyable if Bradyn hadn't constantly kept kissing me and trying to fondle me. I thwarted his movements as much as I could. Finally, I said, "I would really like to watch the movie." He made a face and let me watch the movie. The movie was finally over. I was more than happy.

We arrived at his dorm and we sat in the car for a few minutes. We talked for awhile. He finally asked, "Do you want to go inside and hang out for awhile?" I said, "Yes." I am still trying to figure that one out. We got out of the car and then we walked into his dorm room. His roommate was there watching a movie. Bradyn pushed me passed the living room and into his bedroom. Bradyn's roommate asked, "Ya'll aren't going to get busy on the first date are you?" I made a face and thought to myself, "No way!"

No sooner than we had entered the room, Bradyn closed the door to his room and then started to kiss me. I let him kiss me for a few second before I pushed away from him. I looked at him and said, "I am going to go home. It is getting late." He smiled and then tried to kiss me again. I backed away and got to the door as quickly as I could. I opened the door and walked through the living room to the front door.

I shook my head as I drove home. I silently vowed to never go on another date until I graduated from college.

Challenge 14

5 Great Things

5 Things I Like About Myself
I am a fun-loving person.
I am an easy-going person.
I am very supportive.
I am a fast-learner.
I am a great friend.

5 Positive Things about My Writing
I write a church scene in all of my stories, from the opening prayer to the benediction.
I have continuity in my story. My stories will always be accurate. I pride myself on doing that.
Many of my characters, places, or churches have reoccurring roles in my stories.
I try to include some aspect of repentance in my stories.
I always include healing, deliverance, or restoration in my stories.

Challenge 9

Your Silliest Writing Quirk
My silliest writing quirk is that I can only handwrite my writings (which I love to do) on a certain kind of paper. It has to be college rule and it has to be a certain shade of blue, dark navy blue. The only store that I have seen it in is Wal-Mart and they usually only have like one package of it, so when I see it at the store, I pick up a package of it. If I try to write on any other kind of paper, I get writer's block. Seriously, I can't write a thing, no matter how hard I try.

I think my quirk is cute. My husband does too. He laughs at me all the time when I get excited in the store and I see the paper there.

Challenge #6

Summer Vacation from a Character
KiKi White-Williams watched her god daughters Braisha and Marcelle as they modeled on the new swims that she had purchased for them. It was a tradition that they had started four years earlier. After each GBF Youth Convocation, that she planned and they all attended, she would take her four god daughters to the beach with her. They would spend a week there with her and then she would spend a week by herself.

This year was special though. It was the first time that she had a man at the beach house with her and the girls. KiKi's new husband, Hobert Williams, III was at the beach house with him. She kept wondering how he was going to make it at the house with her, four 20-something young ladies, and one 13 year-old. He was probably going to end up running from the house.

KiKi stopped daydreaming and walked into the bathroom to put on her own swimsuit. They were headed for their first adventure, a swim in the ocean. She couldn't wait for Hobert to see her in the swimsuit. He was in for a nice treat.

Challenge #5

Plotter or Pantser
I am a plotter. I usually have moderate to elaborate outlines. I have been known to stray from my outline from time to time, so actually it was only once before, but I did stray.

Before I begin a story, I usually have "told" myself the story several times before I go to sleep. I usually act out the scenes of my stories in my mind before I go to sleep. I have a hard time going to sleep, so reviewing my stories like that help me out.

I like to get a mental picture of what my characters will look like, that way, I feel closer to them.

I always buy a new spiral for each novel that I write.

Challenge #5

Plotter or Pantser
I am a plotter. I usually have moderate to elaborate outlines. I have been known to stray from my outline from time to time, so actually it was only once before, but I did stray.

Before I begin a story, I usually have "told" myself the story several times before I go to sleep. I usually act out the scenes of my stories in my mind before I go to sleep. I have a hard time going to sleep, so reviewing my stories like that help me out.

I like to get a mental picture of what my characters will look like, that way, I feel closer to them.

I always buy a new spiral for each novel that I write.

Challenge #4

From the Mad Challenge Yahoo! Group
Summer Vacation
I had a lot of fun on vacation in San Antonio, TX.

We went to the Natural Caverns. That was fun.

We went to a wildlife park, where you drive around in your car a feed the animals. That was hilarious. A deer like animal got up close and personal with my husband. The animal stuck his head in the car window on the driver's side and sniffed my husband's hand and then licked my husband on the neck. I was rolling. I didn't have a camera either.

We went to Six Flags. That was cool.

We went to Sea World. We didn't get to see Shamu, much to my husband's dismay. We did see the penguins.

We went to the Schlitterbahn. This is a water park. This was so much fun. We floated around in the wading pool. We went down a couple of water slides. It was fun hanging out in the water with my husband.

I think I may have given one of the life guards an eye full because my swimming suit string came loose and I had to pull my top up. He looked at me kind of funny as I swam by him. OOPS!

We had an incident in I-Hop on our last day. We were sitting at a table and the waiter walked by us twice without saying a word. A white family was seated after we were seated. The waiter walked right over to them and began talking to them and being friendly. He walked by us three more times and didn't say a word. I looked at my husband and said, "If he walks by us one more time. I am going to act a fool." My husband smiled and said, "Calm down. Let's give him five more minutes." I had every intention of giving the guy five more minutes, except, he walked by us and gave the white family their drinks. I was livid at that moment. I stood up, walked up to the front of the restaurant and asked someone, "Who is our waiter?" The person responded, "Chris." I said, "He has walked by us four or five times and has not said a word to us!" A waitress walked up to us and said, "Come on, Baby and sit in my section and I will get you feed quickly." We sat in her section.

We got our food. We got a discount. I was heated though. My husband cracked on me the whole way home. It was kind of funny.

We were in San Antonio. There aren't that many African-Americans in San Antonio. We (African-Americans) have a tendency to be bad tippers. (My husband and I are great tippers, though.) I think that is why Chris acted a fool with us. It can't be said that he didn't see us.

Oh well. Why did somebody have to act a fool with us on the last day of our vacation?

Challenge #3

You & Your Writing
I am a self-actualizing person. No matter where I am, what I am doing, or who I am with, I am in my own world. While in that world, I tend to constantly make-up people, places, and things. There is always something going on in my head.

For a previous job, we took personality tests. The psychologist who administered the test to us said, "I bet you are always thinking about other stuff, no matter what you are doing." I just looked at him and smiled. He said that according to my profile, he could tell that I did.

I started writing at 12. I had to get all of the people, places, and things out of my head. I mostly wrote poetry for church programs. I also kept a journal. Once I got into high school, I began writing more prose for creative writing class. I wrote essays and research papers for classes as well.

I write poetry, short stories, novels, novellas, essays, and research papers. I love writing research papers, strange I know.

I currently display all of my work at Perpetual Inspirations, http://www.alwaysinspired.info/ and LaDawnya's World, http://www.ladawnyasworld.info/.

I love having people read my writing. My family and friends read a lot of my work. I try to get people to look at my websites as much as possible. I have made t-shirts advertising my sites. (Shameless, I know.)

I have had several of my writings published. I am working on a novel that I want to get published. My brother wants me to get it published as well because it is about him.

A year from now, I would like to be finished with my novel, Allegations.
It is a story about something that happened to my brother and me. I am writing it to help with the healing process, but it got hard to write so I had to put it down.

Five years from now, I hope to have two or more books published.

Deartra's Intro

My name is deartra (pronounced dear-tra). My login on most places is mrsdboone. I write Christian fiction. I have written two Christian romances. My most recent work was a fictional story based on my real life. I am not working on anything particular at this time. I am a pre-school teacher, so I spend most of my day playing (teaching) four year olds. I live in TX with my husband of 3 years. I work in the CHildren's Ministry at my church (kindergarten). I love working with small children. I don't have any children unless you count my four stuffed animals, one of which, a little girl, I recently received.

I love goofing around on the computer. I make-up stories, people, places, and things and write about them all the time. I have a bunch of websites dedicated to this silly endeavor. Most of these writings help me come up with a workshop that I give online sometimes.

I like this group because it helps my creativity flow.

Pride Stickers

I get to put 32 pride stickers on my computer. Hooray!

Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y

Goals for the Month of September

Here are my goals for the month.

1. To write something everyday, no matter how big or small.
2. To write down more of the story ideas that I have come up with.
3. Upload Baumann Records.
4. Upload K-3080 Entertainment.
5. Upload Mo'Sound Gospel Records.
6. Upload Prantley Records.
7. Continue to update Perpetual Inspirations.

Writing Goals

For the month of August, I wrote 122,900 words. Yippee! I updated 66 sites.
The last week was hard, but I made it.

Goals for Last Month

I accomplished all of my goals for last month. YEA!

Pride Stickers

I get to put 30 stickers on my computer. Yippee.

Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y

I like being at 30 stickers. :P

Goals for the Month of August

Here are my goals for the month:

1. To write something everyday, no matter how big or small.
2. To write down more of the story ideas that I have come up with.
3. Update Maddocha
4. Continue to update Perpetual Inspirations.
5. Get ready for school.

Writing Goals

I am very proud. For the month of July I wrote 46,543 words. I updated 82 websites. Yea!

I did have to readjust the writing goal for this month. I was having a hard time because of the heat. I had been walking outside several days and it wasn't working for me.

July is a hard month for me, heat wise.

Goals for Last Month

I accomplished six of my monthly goals for last month.

I-Tunes

Why did I-Tunes mess up today? Perhaps it is because I moved my music files to the External drive and didn't do it right.

I had to delete all of the songs and reload them onto I-Tunes. Now, I have to go in and give my songs the right ratings again. A couple of my play lists are based on song ratings.

That's what I get for not following directions. :(

Websites

I created 20 websites this week.

VBS Fun Day

Tonight was fun. I manned a race booth. It was crazy. I had so many kids at my booth that I had to get some more candy. They were all taking the Air Head candy that I had in my bucket.

I walked around outside for a few minutes. The Children's Church minister got in the dunking booth. I saw her get dunked. I thought that was so cool. The assistant pastor was also in the booth.

T-Shirts
I was inspired by the t-shirts that we had to create for VBS, that I got some iron-transfer pages so that I could create my own t-shirts. The first one I created was for my website, I Belong to God. It looked pretty cool for my first one.

VBS

This is the last day that we will have classes for VBS. Tomorrow night is water fun night. The kids will get to have fun outside in a make-shift water park. We will also be doing indoor games. I am supposed to work one of the indoor games. I am not about to be outside.

P.S. I drove the car tonight.

VBS: Walking To the Church

I have been walking to and from the church for VBS. I live like a 15-20 minutes from the church. I am tired today.

It hasn't helped that I had to walk over a mile to the pharmacy to pick up some medicine. I should have gone to the pharmacy before 3:00 PM. That was kind of dumb.

I got a ride home from my co-teacher. She is cool.

Vacation Bible School

Vacation Bible School starts this week at my church, Westside Baptist Church. It is going to be fun. I will be working with the 5 year-olds.

I haven't participated in VBS in forever. Get this; we have to create our own t-shirts using an iron-on transfer thingy. Like I need to be trying to do that.

Birthday Review

I had fun on my birthday. We went to breakfast. We went to the electronics store. I got an external hard drive. (I know. I am a nerd.) We saw Transformers again. I love that movie.

Braids

I got some new braids today. I found someone on this side of town that does them. Man, she did these things tight. My head is hurting like crazy. I can't even laugh.

Birthday

My birthday is tomorrow. Yea!

Websites

I redid 21 websites this week.

Swimming

I have been swimming a lot the past couple of weeks. Our apartment is right next to the pool. That is so cool.

There is always somebody out at the pool.

Adams Family News

I decided to post some good news about the Adams Family. The Adams Family will be having a family reunion this year.

Adams Family Death

I am sad. I decided that one of my characters from the Adams Family would die today. The grand matriarch of the family, Dixie Mae Calhoun died at the age of 105. It was kind of hard to let her die.

I am a bit sad, though. I have never allowed one of my characters to die before. I have changed the Adams Family website to show a page in memory of her.

Working Out

I have been working out since I got back from vacation. Ok, so I have been walking and riding the stationary bike at the gym, but it is something. I am feeling good these days.